great expectations

every year of my adult life that I have lived on my own, I never owned a TV. School and work and relationships always occupied time. more than occupied. they fulfilled it. I’ve been laying around the house a lot this weekend, eating nutella and feeling sorry for myself, watching way too many Lifetime movies and overthinking. I think that’s the most harmful thing about TV. is that you get all these ridiculous expectations in your head about life, or men, or careers. Everything seems so mystical and perfect. Then you turn the TV off and realize you spend 8 hours a day sitting in a pleather chair and scrolling news feeds, that your boyfriend isn’t Jude Law and your degree will probably end of being framed on a fridge covered with your kids mustard stained fingers.

I’ve been thinking a lot about going to law school. I never thought I would say that, but I guess being surrounded by a bunch of perfectly ironed suits and convincing vernacular in the nations capital will do that to you. Everyone on the committee has their J.D. One of them, Micheal who they call Zola, sits next to me in the office. He is in his late 40’s, married with kids. Zola curses like a sailor and harasses everyone with sarcasm. I took an immediate liking to him. We got into one of these conversations the other day, the ones that start with me asking a simple question about jurisdiction or the motion to cloture, then an hour later he’s made some grand thesis about why Republicans are incapable of governing. Anyway, this one conversation turned into him convincing me to go to law school. Zola says everyone should have that experience. That those three years will forever change the way you think, the way you write, and the way you understand the world, justice, and yourself.

I have no desire of being a lawyer, but I have an unyielding desire to grow. One of my biggest fears is remaining stagnant or getting settled into a way of thinking. Plus, there are several careers that would benefit from a background in law besides being a lawyer.

That’s just this weeks thoughts. Eat, Pray, Love is on TV now, who knows, maybe tomorrow I’ll want to run off to an ashram in Bali 🙂


know what i mean?

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