I was supposed to go to Tahoe this weekend with my mom and family friends. Last night before I went to sleep, I got this really uneasy feeling in my stomach. When I woke up it was still there, like I was really anxious and nervous about the trip, which is weird because I grew up snowboarding, I love snowboarding! It was the same experience that I had with yoga a couple weeks ago, when I didnt feel right before the class then ended up passing out. So I went with my gut and changed my mind at 6:30 this morning when we were loading up the car. Im still not really sure why that happened, it was almost as though I had a premonition, like I thought something bad was going to happen. I dont know how to explain it.
Anyways, spring break is coming to an end. I’m excited to go back to the bay, but I’m enjoying time with my family too. I’ve also come to the sad realization that a lot of my old friends are absolute losers. Actually, I guess I have this realization every time I come back to Sac, but its getting more and more apparent. It’s hard because I want to be there for my friends, but at the same time they are toxic, negative energy and making shitty decisions, which makes me want no part of them.
I’ve been reading a lot, trying to stay focussed. You have to surround yourself with positive people because you feed off their energy, and I’m too driven to be getting caught up in some dumb shit. It’s about preparing and positioning yourself for success. Its crucial for me to position myself for the things that I want. Relationships built off lust and connivence don’t last. It’s about being able to see through it all.
After bein’ 25, you know, just trying to survive in the world
when you start gettin that little age and experience you start thinking about stuff,
tryin make the right moves