It’s been a great weekend. Been able to catch up with some old friends and work.
It’s incredible to think about where I was in my life a year ago. In no way do I regret my journey, I have learned so much about myself and other people, but I am grateful to be where I am today. I feel good about where I am going, and most of all, I am proud of who I am today. My choices, my relationships, my health, my state of mind… I really feel like my priorities are right, and that everything else stems from there.
It amazes me what a matter of months and moves can do.
Psalm 42 is this painfully poetic verse about a deep desire to be near to God, the Psalmist says his soul longs for the Lord as a deer pants for water, that he craves the days when he would rejoice in God’s protection, and that now, now where can he find God?
And I know sometimes things seem chaotic and out of reach, and our minds get burdened with trivial quandaries and crisis, but in reality, we are never far from God. In reality, there is no where we can go where God is not there.
Later on in the poem, the Psalmist realizes this, he says, “Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls, all your waves and breakers have swept me over” He was thirsty, and then it hit him, that he is emerged in a waterfall, God’s waves are breaking on him, sweeping him over, and he is overwhelmed with it. And I think that’s how it is sometimes. Like we may feel so disconnected from it all, like God could never be farther. But then theres a break in the wave and you realize you are submerged in glory. Submerged in whatever it is that you are supposed to be in, whether its a relationship or a job, a city or a season, you are where you are supposed to be. And everything you need is right in front of you.
So maybe God doesn’t change our circumstances, because he wants to change us.